The first week at school

Your child will probably be really tired during their first week with all the new experiences, early morning and long days. Make allowances for this, and so not try to pack the time after school with too much activity, play sates or clubs as your child needs plenty of time to recharge their batteries.

Tip: Remember that, although you have tried to prepare your child for their first day at school, each day this week will bring new experiences as your child enjoys the whole week's timetable. Try to treat each day as a first day at school.

If you have concerns or questions that have arisen during the first week try to avoid speaking to the teacher at the start of the day as this is a really busy time. Children need to be settled and get started with the activities that have been planned for that day. Waiting until the end of the day is much more suitable, and, if the teacher thinks it would be better to make an appointment to discuss any issue further, it will be easier for them when the classroom is quiet.

Don't forget that other parents may have the answers to some of your questions, or may be wondering about the same thing, so it is good to start talking to other parents of children in your child's class. However, resist the temptation to become involved in the 'What my child can and can't do' discussions that can go on in playgrounds.

Your first day away from your child

If you know that you are likely to feel anxious about your child starting school, then make plans to do something unusual once they have been dropped off, such as having a haircut, going swimming or meeting a friend for a coffee. This will help to distract you from worrying about your child who is probably quite happy and enjoying the exciting things on offer!

It is not unusual for young children to have a bit of an emotional wobble at the start of the day but generally they will be fine within a few minutes of being in a classroom with experienced adults who are used to working with such young children. This wobble can come at any time and so so not be alarmed if your previously settled child suddenly becomes upset at the start of the day. There are usually simple reasons behind this, such as being really tired, not feeling very well, worrying about something at home and in very rare occasions something at school. Again, make sure you talk to your child's teacher to share any information about possible causes and to work together to settle your child.

Make sure your child has time to relax, rest or play after school before you have dinner and start the bath and bedtime routine. They may bring home a reading book to share with you but this can wait until another time as at this stage this has already been a really busy day! A shared story before bed is a good time to have a quick recap of the day and may help your child to allay any anxieties and settle down so that they relax and have a good night's sleep.

Tip: At the end of the first day, and for the whole of their first week tour child will probably be really tired. Try not to keep asking about what they have done as children will usually volunteer information about the days activities in their own time. If you are curious then ask 'What did you really enjoy today?' as this is less intimidating that 'What did you do today?' and is also more likely to get a response, even if that response is simply 'playtime' or 'lunchtime'!

Starting School; The week before

Now is the time to label absolutely everything your child will be taking to school. Many schools offer advice on the best place to get labels for your child's clothes but it is definitely worth shopping around for the best method which suits you.
You can buy labels which need to be sewn on, ironed on or just stuck in. Sometimes, a combination of iron on labels for clothing and stick on labels for items such as water bottles and 'show and tell' toys is the most appropriate.

http://www.mynametags.com - a combination of both iron on and stick on name labels with or without a wide choice of picture symbols.
http://nametag-it.co.uk - easy fix clip on nametags, iron on labels and stick on labels.
http://easy2name.com - woven name tags for sewing onto clothes

If at all possible choose labels with pictures as well as a name so that your child can recognise not just the word but the symbol in their early reading days.

Although you may have already done this, take a walk along the route that you will cover or drive along at the right time of day. This will show you any new potential roadworks or obstacles which might mean you have to change your timings on the first day. Try and pick out some key landmarks long the journey so that during the first week you can ask questions as a fun way of engaging your child's interest, for example, 'What do you think we will pass next?'

Invite your child to practise putting on their school uniform and PE kit if they have one, and taking it off. Try to make this a fun activity, for example using an egg timer, and sharing a reward if the child succeeds in the given task.
If necessary, explain as well as you can the term PE. It will probably be the first time your child has heard this term but one they will be using often in school and the teachers may assume that your child knows what to expect. Explain that, after changing into exercise clothes, they will able to play lots of games and run, jump and skip about.
Organise a pretend PE lesson with some dolls or soft toys and ask your child to get ready and join in. Ideally, dress and undress the toys too. The PE lesson then becomes something to look forward to rather than a situation that provokes anxiety.

Tip: Don't put too much pressure on your child as this is a week for being relaxed and minimising stress and anxiety. Avoid a countdown to the start of school which might add unnecessary pressure. This should be a time to enjoy together before formal education begins.

As the week progresses, start to build up your morning routine. Talk to your child about all the things they need to do in the morning and in which order. Take photographs of your child doing different events in the morning routine, such as eating breakfast, getting washed, putting on clothes, brushing teeth, fastening shoes, and so on. Print them out and make them into cards so that you and your child can arrange them into a sequence and talk about each event and what it involves. You could then stick them onto a large piece of paper and hang it up in their bedroom so they know which steps they need to be getting on with.

Tip: Try getting up at 'school time' to get children used to the earlier mornings, aim to have had breakfast and be washed and dressed by the time you need to leave the house.

Starting School; The month before

The bedtime routine

Start to prepare your child for the routine of school with a regular bedtime routine about a month before the big day. If you already have a routine; you may need to look at moving the process forward a little in preparation for starting school.

Research suggests that children of three to five years need between 10-12 hours sleep a night to be able to function and learn properly at school. 

The shopping trip

 

A few weeks before starting school, you can take your child to buy the remaining school uniform. Make this a special outing so that your child feels excited and confident about the forthcoming event. You might enjoy going for lunch together or buying a small treat. Check with the school first whether they will allow you to buy none logo specific items and make a list of what is expected in terms of colours and styles.

Tip: Don't buy the uniform too early to ensure that the items you do purchase still fit properly on the first day. Children grow quickly and many articles of clothing are not necessary.

School shoes will probably have to be either black or blue and a good sturdy pair which have been fitted; this will be one of your best investments. Sometimes cheaper shoes tend to be false economy because inevitable wear and tear in the playground means you might end up buying more than one pair a term. Try to get your child's feet measured at least once a term as they often grow quickly in those first few months!

When buying a coat or jacket, try to make sure your child can manage the fastenings. For example; some children have difficulty with toggles and zips, while others find them easy but cannot fasten buttons.

Your child will enjoy choosing a water bottle or lunch box as these now come in many designs, often featuring a favourite character that can easily be recognised. Try to make sure everything is easy to open and close for your child and that the water bottle have a secure lid.

If your child does not have a school uniform, try to buy hard wearing clothes that are for school only. This avoids any disagreements about what to wear in the morning and saves favourite clothes for home.

Tip: Remember not to send your child to school in their best or designer clothes as they will inevitably get dirty and possibly wet!

Labeling your child's clothing is a must as you don't want to loose anything at school. If you are not a confident sewer then a black permanent marker is essential for marking bags, lunch boxes and the inside of shoes. You will probably only manage your child's initials inside shoes so make sure your child is able to recognise their initials as well as their full name. Marking your child's initials under the tongue of their shoes will help to identify them easily and they will not get rubbed off by sweaty feet and socks, but most importantly, make sure your child knows where to look for their initials.

Is your child Ready for School? For parents of School Starters by Prof. Matt Sanders of Triple P

I found this article from my Local Children's centre page and thought I would share these very useful tips for parents with children due to start school this September. I know Jack is both excited and also a little worried about going to a new school he isn't familiar with.

Some children cannot wait to start school and eagerly look forward to their first day.  For other children the reality of starting school creates anxiety and worry. Children cope better with these transitions when they are well prepared.

Here are some ideas for preparing children to start school.

• Talk or read to your child about starting school.  Answer questions and talk about school, but don't overload the child with information all at once. Check out a local bookshop or library for children's books on starting school. These books can be read often to children as a way of preparing them for what lies ahead.

• Tell your child when school will start and make sure they are familiar with the surroundings.  You may have already taken your child to visit the school but if you haven't, make sure they know where the toilets, lunch and play areas are.

• If possible, involve your child in buying things for school such as stationery, schoolbags, lunch box, clothes or uniform.

• Let your child know that you will be there on the first day.  On the first day, some schools may permit parents of new entrants to stay with their child until they are settled.  This is reassuring to a youngster who may be feeling anxious.  If you say you're going to stay, make sure you do.

• On the first day at school stay with your child as long as you are required.  Make yourself as unobtrusive as possible but gently prompt your child to become involved in the classroom's activities rather than clinging to you.  Some children who have had separating problems at preschool may experience similiar problems now.  If your child usually gets upset when you leave but settles quickly when you're gone, be prepared to explain you are going, say goodbye, and leave. It might take a few days for your child to get used to being in the new situation.  However, most children quickly adapt to the excitement and challenge of starting school.  Occasionally children can develop a marked fear of going to school (school phobia).  Usually such children are not frightened of school per se, although some can be, but they are afraid of separating ftom their parents.  If your child is extremely difficult to get to school, complains of aches and pains on school mornings, screams and in other ways protests about going to school, seek advice from the class teacher on how best to handle the situation.  Generally speaking, it is very important that such a child miss as little school as possible.

• Getting Into a Good School Morning Routine.  School mornings are smoother for everyone when children are in a good morning routine.  This involves children learning to do what's required and learning to do most things for themselves, without constant reminders.  At this age your child can be expected to be more independent in getting themselves out of bed, getting dressed, eating breakfast, brushing teeth, packing school bags and being ready to leave at a particular time.

Difficulties arise when parents do everything for the child, are late in getting up, or are disorganised in the morning.  In some homes the morning routine is unpleasant, with parents yelling at children to get them out the door.  Here are some ideas for making the morning routine more pleasant and less stressful.

• Put your child to bed at a reasonable time. This is important as children with insufficient sleep find it hard to wake up and are often grumpy and irritable in the morning.

• Be organised.  Get everything you and your child need ready the night before.  Make sure school clothes are easy to locate and put on and get up in plenty of time yourself.

• Start an activity schedule for the morning routine.  This will help your child learn the steps they must follow in the morning.  An activity schedule is a simple chart to help children learn to do tasks in a particular order.  It involves having a picture, drawing or words that can be placed on a velcro strip to represent the "step".  The strip can be attached to the wall in a convenient location (e.g. kitchen wall, bedroom, bathroom).  When your child completes each step, the velcro strip can be removed and placed in a container under the chart.  For the first few days, you can give your child reminders, but keep them to a minimum.  Children will not learn to do things for themselves if they become reliant on reminders.  Once your child can do each step with only one prompt, phase out reminders.  Make sure you pay particular attention and praise your child when they perform a step on their own, without first being reminded. Avoid getting angry or irritated.  Speak to your child pleasantly in the morning.  Getting angry and irritated makes it harder for children to learn what is expected of them. Provide a reward.  If the child completes all the steps without having to be reminded, give your child a reward, such as a special snack treat in their lunch or a special game or activity after school if there is not time in the morning.  Once your child is in a good school morning routine, you can phase out the activity schedule.

* Professor Matt Sanders is Director of the Parent and Family Support Centre at the University of Queensland and founder of the Triple P.